Contentment

My whole life I have always been waiting and searching for the next exciting thing to come along.  I think that is why I went to three different universities and never lived in the same room for longer than a semester.  It seems so silly to think about now...why couldn't I just stay put?

I remember being in High School, there was always something I was talking about, wanting, dreaming.  My mother used to always tell me to be content...even though I know in my mind that my life is fine....great actually but in my heart I want more.  More what? A house...maybe to live in Europe...I really can't say exactly what it is I want.  Being stagnant is never a good thing although never being happy with what is given to you isn't so great either.  Finding that balance...how do I get there?

I am reading "Waking the Dead" by John Eldredge.  His books are so meaty...there are times I only get through a few pages and then I must stop and reflect on what I've learned.  At times I don't want to pick it up because I know there is a lot of truth in what he writes and learning truth means change.  Anyway...I am reading about how the heart is central.  John points out many verses in the Bible that deal with the heart...how in Duet. 6:5 it says "Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength." Jesus called this the greatest of all commandments and notice that the heart comes first.  I also love this quote John gives at the beginning of chapter 3 by Beauchene "You are never a great man when you have more mind than heart."  I always want to live that way...

I am looking forward to picking up "Waking the Dead" more often and relaying more on Christ to bring me the fulfillment and contentment I so desperately need rather than earthly things.  My heart will only be satisfied by the love of Christ...then maybe my heart will agree with my mind that I am content.